tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post7477617554257440010..comments2024-03-29T04:01:31.445-04:00Comments on Lovely Bicycle!: The 'Psychic Spouse' FallacyVelouriahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00359329171411037482noreply@blogger.comBlogger40125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-91315811905382112942012-01-30T10:32:01.855-05:002012-01-30T10:32:01.855-05:00Never ridden a tandem but I agree that the trust f...Never ridden a tandem but I agree that the trust factor must be huge.<br /><br />I recall fixing a flat on a mountain bike excursion on Mt. Tam when a male/female tandem came flying down the steep, rutted, washed out trail that had just blown my tire. Trust... lots of it.<br /><br />My wife would probably never go for that... I'll go think about what that means about our marriage!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-78943121367302640442012-01-30T05:24:24.227-05:002012-01-30T05:24:24.227-05:00My favourite thing about riding with my wife (only...My favourite thing about riding with my wife (only to get places in the city, not recreationally) is our system of bell echolocation. I usually open the way, and after trickier intersections, I'll ring my bell and expect her to ring back if she's made it through too. She instinctively adds a little delay if she's further behind.<br /><br />Our arguments usually come when I assert myself more aggressively on than she's comfortable with; I don't shy away from honking jerks, sometimes going to moderate confrontation, when I feel unsafe or threatened. She has a higher threshold. We just have different understandings of the notion of "staying out of trouble". That's gender roles for you.Klaus Mohnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05953775726413454938noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-68920490451362529482012-01-29T20:44:39.108-05:002012-01-29T20:44:39.108-05:00My husband and I don't get to ride together mu...My husband and I don't get to ride together much because he works at home and I ride purely for transport these days, so my usual co-pilot is my 3 year old son. <br /><br />He doesn't hesitate to communicate pretty much constantly about how the ride is going, pointing out various potholes, especially weird street behavior, wind level etc. And of course there is also the stuff like "Mama, I'm going to hold your butt now so it's not cold."neighbourteasehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17571138655370581828noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-54895216437711702322012-01-29T19:56:58.125-05:002012-01-29T19:56:58.125-05:00Unfortunately,my Wife doesn not (nor does she have...Unfortunately,my Wife doesn not (nor does she have any interest in) ride,so I don't get the priviledge of this malady =\<br /><br />The Disabled CyclistAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-86060313703796355392012-01-29T18:02:49.118-05:002012-01-29T18:02:49.118-05:00ah, my relationship with silentq started with her ...ah, my relationship with silentq started with her cleverly asking me if I wanted to join her for bike mechanic classes at Bikes Not Bombs, and on the rides from the classes to one of our respective apartments, we came to appreciate that we both stop at lights, both signal turns and were generally around the same speed. Our styles changed over the years of our relationship, with me getting into more long distance stuff and road cycling, and her being perfectly happy to stick with her trusty hybrid. Not a big deal. When I started randonneuring on my own, she'd take up another hobby like parkour or rock climbing while I was away, but we still enjoyed riding together in the city. We would have some disagreements about routes to take, but usually worked out an agreement that whoever was leading would pick the route. So, yeah, unlike some other commentators, base speed of our bikes aside, our riding styles were very compatible.<br /><br />Now, cooking? That's a whole other topic. Up to the point when we broke up, we realized that it was better for all involved that we take separate turns making our breakfast and staying the hell out of each other's way whenever one of us was up to something in the kithcen.<br /><br />Romantic partners are -partners- not clones.crishttp://cris.livejournal.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-83797916360880495502012-01-29T12:56:40.705-05:002012-01-29T12:56:40.705-05:00when we do ride together- we tend to do our own th...when we do ride together- we tend to do our own thing. He rides faster than I do and he rides more VC than I do. But I ride our neighborhood more so I tend to want to lead even though he's in front. but mostly I just ignore him and do my own thing...MamaVeehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09519007680870604271noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-87417282373432153412012-01-29T12:39:48.821-05:002012-01-29T12:39:48.821-05:00The beauty of adult relationships is they can be w...The beauty of adult relationships is they can be whatever those adults choose them to be, sorta like the theme of this blog. Whatever works best, and then like all dynamic things....things change. Lovely.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-77927095764968764242012-01-29T11:47:36.177-05:002012-01-29T11:47:36.177-05:00It would seem that my wife and I can read each oth...It would seem that my wife and I can read each others minds. We ride our tandem a lot, excessively during vacations, rarely is any verbal communication necessary (that is about the riding, plenty of verbalizing happens otherwise). We do have similar riding styles, which is usually as fast as we can make the thing go. We're not racers by any means, the bike is a heavy mountain bike (we do sometimes trail ride) with suspension and fenders, often outfitted with front and rear panniers and trailer for impromptu shopping or to stop and pick up pretty rocks. (Rocks!?!) We do ride separate bikes together with good result, more often around home at slower speeds. If we want to go fast and far the tandem is it.Kevinhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01422028839822520775noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-15886602192463795672012-01-29T10:39:22.166-05:002012-01-29T10:39:22.166-05:00Couples, if you are going to go the tandem route, ...Couples, if you are going to go the tandem route, please practice somewhere other riders aren't before going anywhere riders are.<br /><br />One of the more terrifying things about Chicago's (overly) popular Lake Front in the summertime are tourist with no prior experience riding a rented tandem. 300+ pounds of flesh and steel wobbling over a mixed use trail is a disaster that all too frequently happens.<br /><br />[Rant warning] The Lake Front trail is arguably one of the more beautiful urban rides in the world, but its popularity when the weather is reasonable is quickly making it one of the least pleasant.Matthew Jhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10408057524387021992noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-61789725293499846252012-01-29T07:43:18.334-05:002012-01-29T07:43:18.334-05:00This is one of the reasons I started commuting a n...This is one of the reasons I started commuting a number of years ago. 99 percent of my yearly cycling mileage is by way of riding too and from work. My wife and I still enjoy a bike path ride together on the occasional weekend but that's it. I would love to try a tandem with her but as of yet have not figured out a way to keep the cost of that experiment to a minimum.Don in Boisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10090611155811161331noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-56946466227124462752012-01-29T07:27:14.287-05:002012-01-29T07:27:14.287-05:00Our best strategy is to put the slower person firs...Our best strategy is to put the slower person first, which usually has to do with who is on the more heavily loaded bike (someone's bike almost always has kids on it), not drastically mis-matched strength. <br /><br />Our biggest frustration seems to come from both being chatterboxes. I find communication difficult when we're on separate bikes, though we do pretty well for basic "I'm stopping at this light" or "you take the lead here" type communication. What causes problems is when one of us thinks some random thought and starts to talk without thinking, and the other can't hear, and we devolve into yelling back and forth "What?!!" "Nevermind!!" "What???" "Nevermind!!!"<br /><br />Once we figured out how to ride it, the tandem solved this, though I know not every relationship is suited to a tandem (I was not nearly communicative or nice enough at first when riding captain, but we got it right by the second or third ride). We can chat as much as we want without yelling. This bike doesn't get used often, but it makes the few rides we do have just the two of us a lot of fun.Doreahttp://carfreecambridge.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-7105061598826497522012-01-29T00:34:08.583-05:002012-01-29T00:34:08.583-05:00We do a lot of tandem randonneuring taken both the...We do a lot of tandem randonneuring taken both the good and bad experiences as a part of life: a relationship is about that in our opinion!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-53905815303529918412012-01-29T00:31:50.434-05:002012-01-29T00:31:50.434-05:00Psychic? You mean my spouse can't read my min...Psychic? You mean my spouse can't read my mind!?!? Years ago I had a friend who said he would reject any prospective girlfriend who couldn't share riding with him. And that meant she had to keep up. So I wound up riding with her more than he did - further back in the group. By contrast, I have always held that couples have other things together besides cycling. <br /><br />My partner of 23 years and I have rarely ridden together. Cycling is much more my hobby/avocation/obsession. <br /><br />Tandems. Tried it for a few years but ultimately wound up "raising my stoker", the son who started out in a bike trailer behind the tandem or one of my stouter solo bikes. Same goes for tandem vs. solo canoes/kayaks in my experience.<br /><br />One very true thing you learned from your brief rental experience of tandeming - it's fast! Same is true of tandem canoe vs. solo.<br /><br />As you will probably know from your group ride experinces, a sensitive ride leader can keep a group together. They mind how the other riders are doing. And if it is a dedicated peleton drafting, the followers have a duty to let the leader know if they are having trouble holding the pace BEFORE they fall out of the slipstream and let a gap open.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-69413069406230837902012-01-28T22:29:20.135-05:002012-01-28T22:29:20.135-05:00Sorry, the REPLY button isn't working.
Yes, t...Sorry, the REPLY button isn't working.<br /><br />Yes, that movie is a stitch. And no, I can't imagine cycling with that type of partner. They did divorce if I remember correctly. Thanks for the laugh.<br /><br />It all boils down to, how bad do you want to cycle with your spouse? And what does this mean, either way, to your relationship?anniebikeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09761205231523083781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-39556222697695209012012-01-28T21:32:18.858-05:002012-01-28T21:32:18.858-05:00Your experience is awesome. But you can't assu...Your experience is awesome. But you can't assume that just because something works for you it can work for everyone. I recommend watching the War of the Roses movie and imagining them on a tandem!Velouriahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00359329171411037482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-79545545992343036992012-01-28T21:23:15.468-05:002012-01-28T21:23:15.468-05:00I don't believe that psychic babble at all. If...I don't believe that psychic babble at all. If you've ridden with your spouse from the get go you should know each others' riding styles and compensate accordingly. Case in point, my husband and I have ridden and toured for 30 years. We still love to pedal even for an hour together and treat that as a date now that we have two children. He's always been faster and slows to my pace without complaint, just like in a marriage where there must be compromise. More recently we toured in <br />Canada, me on my old Miyata touring bike while he used a mountain bike with fatter tires. We've never had that ego thing nor competitiveness going on. If anything, our riding together brings us closer. <br /><br />Shame on some of you! All it takes is communication or a tandem, if that's your thing.anniebikeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09761205231523083781noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-57556710371510161532012-01-28T20:13:52.449-05:002012-01-28T20:13:52.449-05:00"Here is some "vintage" Lovely Bicy..."Here is some "vintage" Lovely Bicycle : ))"<br /><br />I forgot about your tandem rental- that seems a long time ago.Corey Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15381826721030941179noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-71098075752018244712012-01-28T19:25:50.374-05:002012-01-28T19:25:50.374-05:00Tandem? That's like putting a pool table in a...Tandem? That's like putting a pool table in a bar...instant fight starter. My wife and I tried the tandem thing, and she quickly went back to flinging her kettle bell around. I got back to riding solo or with my buddies.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-61285407898037963982012-01-28T19:10:05.090-05:002012-01-28T19:10:05.090-05:00Like all things cycling, you work it out on the ro...Like all things cycling, you work it out on the road.Ground Round Jimhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09103163385322185034noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-43849630398070621622012-01-28T18:38:00.219-05:002012-01-28T18:38:00.219-05:00That's not the issue with us oddly enough. It&...That's not the issue with us oddly enough. It's more like an inability to coordinate/communicate well while on the bikes. Last time we went on a long ride together, we approached an intersection side by side and went in different directions! I thought we were on the same page re the route, but we definitely were not! Even funnier is that it took me a bit to realise that we were no longer cycling together! I ended up turning around and going after him in the other direction and eventually caught up!Velouriahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00359329171411037482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-15933515742470000172012-01-28T18:34:19.894-05:002012-01-28T18:34:19.894-05:00That's the spirit!
I though that I was unabl...That's the spirit! <br /><br />I though that I was unable to ride with anyone, then suddenly that changed. No idea why.Velouriahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00359329171411037482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-52353367168916969402012-01-28T18:16:09.839-05:002012-01-28T18:16:09.839-05:00Tandem you say?
Here is some "vintage"...Tandem you say? <br /><a href="http://lovelybike.blogspot.com/2009/08/seaside-tandem.html" rel="nofollow">Here</a> is some "vintage" Lovely Bicycle : ))<br /><br />I wouldn't mind riding tandem on a roadbike once in a while. But then we would need yet another bike...Velouriahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00359329171411037482noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-82274246876303128762012-01-28T18:02:33.600-05:002012-01-28T18:02:33.600-05:00Riding together. Hm. Often like what somervillain ...Riding together. Hm. Often like what somervillain describes. Tread carefully, and be flexible in what constitutes victory conditions.<br /><br />I've spent two days in a tandem kayak with my <br />favorite person in one of the most beautiful places on Earth to paddle, and by the end of it we knew why experienced kayakers call them "divorce boats."<br /><br />Tandems would seem to be about the same thing.Corey Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15381826721030941179noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-34115274163961233142012-01-28T17:14:09.364-05:002012-01-28T17:14:09.364-05:00Velouria -
Add a third vote for you and the C-H tr...Velouria -<br />Add a third vote for you and the C-H trying a tandem. The tandem partners really need to work together, not only at the start (which is a bit tricky) but every time there is a need to shift gears, coast or go over bumps that are hidden to the stoker in the back. If you like it, and get good at it, the upside is that you can go faster than anyone else. <br /><br /><a href="http://affordableluxuryblog.com" rel="nofollow">Affordable Luxury</a>M_Perkshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00454698619383397208noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6467858377106451384.post-21691848824995349572012-01-28T17:12:59.142-05:002012-01-28T17:12:59.142-05:00tandem works for us too. Used to get fed up with ...tandem works for us too. Used to get fed up with each other cycling up hill at different pace etc. Now tandem and triplet with my daughters - they love it, but don't want the commentary (I'm changing gear, I'm about to freewheel, braking now etc) that is necessary with an adult.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com